Gosh Lola. Watching you scratch yourself in your sleep, makes me think that soon you’ll wake up and try to see if your fabulously fabulous form casts a shadow in the light of the….What? Wrong Groundhog Story?…
Hold your Hornfels! -“That’s what my father always used to say to me, if I was too impatient with things. I remember one birthday when-“
“You know something”, said Lola with that look on her face that told me that I knew what she was going to say, and didn’t need to say it, but I also knew, she was going to tell me anyway…
“I’ve had to invest some of our hard-earned money on a book, “Everything you never wanted to know about Granodiorite, but were afraid to ask!” which amazingly enough, doesn’t cover all of your odd-Hornfels, Unconformities, Metamorphosed Dacites and the odd whatever, but-“
“Gosh Lola. Just hearing you utter all of that Geology in one breath, gives me Moose Bumps! And some of them in places, I normally wouldn’t think of getting them. Just look here, said while unbuckling his belt and-“
“Stop right there Mr Rhyolite! I might have a cast-iron stomach when eating your Chili Moose Flakes, but that doesn’t mean I need to suffer from seeing your out of the way Moose Bumps, now does it?”
“You should have asked me before spending your nickles and dimes on that book. I have a whole library of Geological Books, that Howie hasn’t eaten, and….Lola? Howie is our son, the Moose, or have you forgotten that?”
“I know darned well who Howie is, but what I don’t know is why anyone who I’ve known for all these years, would suddenly start telling me about his Geological Time-line in Healy, while….OK. Healy Alaska. Are you satisfied Mr Hornfel?”
“Well done!” he said to Lola, and wanted to tell her how her eyes sparkled just like Plagioclase Feldspar in Granodiorite, but didn’t think now was the right time to pay her that compliment!
“You’ve come full-circle, bringing us back to my birthday of long-ago. We, that is my other friends who would only profess to be from Healy, but there might have been some out-of-towners, you know like Cana……looking at Lola looking at him about to say….but we accepted each other all the same. The first game was pin the Feldspar on the Granite, and I was spun around 2 times, because we all knew that all Feldspar have 2-directions of perfect cleavage, which made my buddies snicker and start to say things like, who wouldn’t want that kind of woman, and-“
“Is there really a point to this blog, or are we going to argue about what I am being forced to hear about, during the length and breadth of this amalgam of words?”
“Well”, said while writing down “Amalgam” for later reference, “I was just about to pin the Plagioclase on the Granite, when my father just lost his cool and started screaming and shouting at me and my friends. When I took off the blindfold, he was standing in front of me saying, “You know darn well that an abundance of Plagioclase means that your precious Granite is really Granodiorite?”
“I never had seen him so mad before, which made me run into the house where my mother was just putting the finishing touches on my birthday cake, “Minus 13 million years old today” which as anyone who is no one knows that old joke about the 2 Geologists and the Mineralogist who come into that bar and the first one says, ….”
With Lola’s face turning colors, reminiscent of the reddish colors of Orthoclase Feldspar, I suddenly remembered what my mother said at that moment, when I ran in all out of breath, wondering what my father was going to do next: “Son, which is what she still wanted to call me, when my father was not in the room, “Don’t be so hard on your father. You see, he and I met at the Granite Harvest Moon Ball, and the other boys present taunted him about the Plagioclase-colored rose he had given me, saying that it looked more like orthoclase, and you know how….
,Lola just started whistling a little tune as she thumbed through her book on Granodiorite. “You know what? I’ve finally figured out why this blog is going nowhere…..You’ve been using the wrong tags all along! You should have started out with Feldspar in Love, or How I took her Granodiorites for Granite, or have you kissed your Unconformity Today, and we would have been getting likes, Diamond over Talc, are you getting my Continental Drift now boy?”
I could only see Hornfels sparkling in her eyes, knowing indeed that we were made for each other! I wondered what my parents, especially my father would have said about her at that moment, but I figured that their loss was my gain.
And I just lie there speechless, watching as she metamorphosed my heart into something entirely new, something that had changed my composition forever……it must be love……
“-or, a darned good Subduction Zone!”, which is what my father would have said, but my mother might just have hit him on the head with a good piece of Slate saying, “If you-
-still whistling her little tune, as the blog dove under the North American Plate with the grace and ease of the Pacific Plate, with Lola just sighing as she watched the words fall off the paper and be consumed in the fires of…
-but we’ll have to save that story for another time won’t we now?